If you follow my Instagram then you already know the big news – we’re expecting baby #2! We are officially out of the first trimester and let me tell you, it has been a WILD ride.
With Ethan, I was 6 weeks along before I even realized that I might be pregnant & the pregnancy was officially confirmed at just over 7 weeks. With baby #2, I started noticing that I was having some nausea in the mornings but that wasn’t quite enough to clue me in that I might be pregnant. What really did it for me was when I started gagging while brushing my teeth. That was such a specific first trimester symptom I had with Ethan that I instantly knew I was pregnant again. My gag reflex is absolutely terrible in early pregnancy – anything from brushing my teeth, to swallowing my prenatal, to the smell of coffee can set it off.
Before I took a pregnancy test, I looked in my fitness tracker to see when my last cycle was. I was confused because according to my app I had just had a period about 2 weeks prior. I had made a specific note in the app that it was very light and lasted only 2 or 3 days, which is very unusual for me. I continued on with taking a pregnancy test and when it came back positive I took 2 more in the following 48 hours. When they all came back positive, I started thinking that perhaps what I had thought was a light period was actually implantation or spot bleeding. I looked back at the cycle before last & figured out that I was probably about 4 or 5 weeks along.
I called my OB office and explained everything and they told me I would have to wait until I was at least 6 weeks to have the blood work done to officially confirm the pregnancy. They sent over a referral for the bloodwork and I marked on my calendar to go the following week.
The morning that I took that first pregnancy test, just so happened to be the same day that my husband left for a week-long work trip to Asia. So of course, I find out that I might be pregnant and my husband is on the other side of the world. It was so frustrating because I wanted so badly to share the news with him but at the same time, I knew that he was going to be doing so much traveling in the next week and he was going to be so exhausted that it would just be too hard to try to connect with him and share the news when we had the time difference and so many other factors working against us. I decided it would be better to wait and surprise him with the good news when he got back.
My husband came home on a Friday and I was due to have the blood work drawn that following Monday. Now here’s where things started to get interesting…and scary.
That weekend I started bleeding. It looked exactly like I had just started my period but without the corresponding cramping. I was a little concerned but honestly, didn’t think too much of it because I had learned from my scare with Ethan that bleeding was actually quite normal. My husband also wasn’t too worried about it but after 2 straight days of fairly heavy bleeding, we agreed I should call my OB and let them know before my appointment on Monday morning.
The nurse took my message and told me my OB would give me a call shortly and let me know if I should continue ahead with the bloodwork, which was to be drawn at a lab – not in their office, or if I should hold off. When my OB called me back, she told me to skip the bloodwork and head straight to an imaging center near me for an “emergency” sonogram. She had called ahead and told them to expect me within the hour. It was at this point that I started panicking.
I was shaking as I sat in the waiting room. My husband wasn’t allowed to come with me thanks to COVID so I went back, alone and terrified, not even sure if there was a baby to even be concerned about. Was this all a huge overreaction due to a heavy period and a couple of false positives? Or was I pregnant and just having routine spot bleeding? I didn’t want to think about the worst case scenario.
My technician let me know from the start that she was going to try to locate a heartbeat, but at such an early stage of pregnancy, that might not be possible so I shouldn’t freak out. Instead, she would be able to look at the scan and determine if there was a baby or not, and then the doctor would review the scan and determine if there was anything to be concerned about. Thankfully, the scan looked perfectly normal AND she was able to get a heartbeat. Relief rushed over me & I went home feeling like a weight had been lifted from my chest. Yay, we had a baby!
A few hours later, my OB called and told me not to get excited just yet – they were still very concerned about the bleeding. She told me to get to the lab and have blood drawn so they could check my hCG levels. I was worried because I assumed since the scan didn’t show any blood, I was ok and it had just been routine spot bleeding. Over the next few days, I had a second sonogram and 2 blood draws. Once again, everything looked normal.
Now, we were told we could breathe. We were pregnant, the baby was ok & the bleeding was chalked up to spot bleeding.
I scheduled my first visit to start my maternity care for baby #2 and we made the decision to tell our parents and siblings the good news. Everything was smooth sailing for a couple of weeks & the first visit with my OB went off without a hitch. By this point, we were at 9 weeks and made the decision to opt for the 10 week genetic testing. In all honesty, we had no concerns to warrant the testing – we just wanted to find out the gender early.
The next week, at exactly 10 weeks along, I went into the office to have the nurse draw my blood for the genetic testing. That morning, for the first time in a few weeks, I had bled – with some clotting. Again, it hadn’t been a concern at all, especially after the initial bleeding turned out to be perfectly normal. I casually mentioned it to the nurse as she was taking my vitals and her face fell. She told me to wait and walked away. Uh…what was happening??
When she came back, she told me there wasn’t an OB available to check me out and that they needed me to head down to the ER. She let me know that she had called ahead and they would be waiting for me. I called my husband and he assured me that it was all a precaution and they had to take any and all bleeding seriously so I shouldn’t worry. I agreed and decided not to get upset – I was confident a quick scan would confirm everything was ok and I’d be on my way home.
I was admitted, changed into a gown and asked to provide a urine sample. I was then hooked up to an IV, as my bladder had just been emptied, so I would have a full bladder for the sonogram. About 2 hours later, they took me down for the sonogram. As I suspected, the technician told me everything looked normal and I should be out of there shortly. I went back to my room and the nurse told me to hang tight, the doctor would review my report and come in to speak with me shortly.
2 hours later, the doctor came in.
He was only in my room for all of 10 minutes and in that short amount of time he managed to bring my world crashing down. He told me that the report revealed that I had a cyst on my right ovary and there was a tear in the wall of my uterus causing internal bleeding. He literally said to me, “this early in pregnancy it can go one of two ways: the tear can heal itself or it will continue to grow and you’ll miscarry. We’ll just have to wait and see”. That was it, no further explanation provided.
I was “diagnosed” with a threatened abortion – which is essentially what they call a potential miscarriage – and given paperwork on how to deal with a miscarriage and manage my grief. The nurse told me I would need to follow up with my OB immediately for an additional scan to track the progression of the tear and I was sent home.
I got in my car and lost it. I sobbed for what felt like hours. I truly thought we were in the clear and this was all a little bit of an overreaction but in my hands were documents explaining what was going to happen when I miscarried and numbers for support hotlines. I called my husband and told him I was on my way home and then called my mom. When I got home, I didn’t leave the couch for the rest of the day.
The next morning, when my OB office opened, I called and let them know what the ER had said and was advised the doctor was going to review the report and they’d call me back to set up my follow-up appointment. When they called back, the nurse told me not to panic – the doctor would explain when I came in but they did not see anything on that report to cause them any concern. I was asked to come in the next day and take the time before my appointment to rest.
While I should have felt relief, I felt anger. I was downright pissed. I was only 10 weeks along and already we had been told on 3 separate occasions that something was wrong with our baby. 3 times we rode an emotional rollercoaster. Finally, someone actually found something wrong and gave me a real reason to worry and now, less than 24 hours later, we’re being told everything is fine? What the Hell was happening and what, if anything, was wrong with my baby?
The next day, my OB apologized profusely for the ER doctor’s explanation. She explained to me that yes, I had a cyst and yes, I had a tear but they were both perfectly normal and of no concern. The cyst was simply the cell cluster that is left behind after the egg is released from the ovary. These cysts usually go away on their own during the first trimester. The tear was due to implantation. When my little babe implanted, they decided to get a bit too close to a cluster of blood vessels, which caused irritation and subsequently, bleeding. Again, all normal and of absolutely no concern. The bleeding I had noticed that morning was simply me passing the blood clot that had formed.
Essentially, the ER doctor was not an OBGYN and therefore when he saw the cyst and the tear, he saw a cause for concern and as miscarriage is always a possibility in early pregnancy – that’s where to leapt to. I was angry at first but after speaking to my OB I understand that from his perspective it did appear much worse than if someone that specializes in Obstetrics had been the one to review the report. My OB did agree that he should have handled the situation more delicately and not pushed the idea of miscarriage so strongly, but the important thing was that baby was healthy.
Ya’ll – those first 10 weeks were hard. I felt like I had run back to back emotional marathons but we’re now sitting at almost 15 weeks and we have a happy, healthy baby GIRL on the way. I am so thankful that everything worked out in our favor and very much aware that for many women, that’s not the case. We are thanking God that Ethan will have a beautiful little sister in just 6 short months and keeping those women that are struggling with infertility & loss in our hearts.
If you’ve had a similar experience, I’d love to chat with you and if you’re currently trying to get pregnant or in your first trimester, I’d be more than happy to share more information regarding the cyst and tear if you’re interested!
